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Visitors since May 26/99

  Page last updated April 19, 2001

 

Say ...


... woman who go to man's apartment for snack, get titbit.
... man who lay woman on ground, get piece on earth.
... man who get kicked in testicles, left holding the bag.
... man who kisses girl's behind, get crack in face.
... passionate kiss like spider web, lead to undoing of fly.
... man with hole in pocket, feel cocky.
... man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night.
... virginity like balloon, one prick, all gone.
... girl who ride bicycle, peddle a$$ all over town.
... he who fart in church, sit in own pew.

Not sure exactly ... some dude from China


... baseball no sport, man with four balls cannot walk.
... man who live in glass house, dress in basement.
... Kotex is not best thing on earth, is next-to-best thing on earth.
... man with penis in peanut butter jar, f_cking nuts.
... man who walk through airport door sideways, going to Bangkok.
... man who drop watch in toilet, bound to have $hitty time.
... man who take lady on camping trip, have one intent.
... man who go to bed with stiff problem, wake with solution in hand.
... man who stand on toilet, high on pot.
... man who buy drowned cat, get wet pussy.

Really?  Hmmm ... have you ever been to China?


... it is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.
... man who jizz in cash register, come into money.
... man who finger girl having period, caught red handed.
... man trapped in pantry, have a$$ in jam.
... man who eat too many prunes, get good run for money.
... man who go to bed with itchy a$$hole, wake with stinky finger.
... learn to masturbate, come in handy.
... war not determine who right, war determine who left.
... naked man fear no pickpocket.
... squirrel who run up woman's leg, not find nuts.

Nope ... but I like Chinese food!


... the end of day is near when small men make long shadows.
... better to be pi$$ed off than pissed on.
... woman who cook carrots and peas in same pot, not sanitary.
... couple on seven day honeymoon, make whole week.
... girl who sit on jockey's lap get hot tip.
... girl who sit on judge's lap get honorable discharge.
... waitress who sit on leper's lap, keep tip.
... butcher who back into meat grinder, get a little behind in his work.
... man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets, feeling nuts.
... man who shoot off mouth, expect to lose face.

So how come you can't keep still?


... man who snort coke, get bubbles up nose.
... man with big mouth, beware of foot.
... man who fly upside down have crack up.
... man who leap off cliff, jump to conclusion.
... shallow woman like man with short temper.
... man under wheelbarrow playing with tool, not necessarily mechanic.
... house without bathroom, uncanny.
... foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.
... man who eat many prunes, sit on can for many moons.
... man who sleep with bitchy wife, wake with itchy trigger-finger.

Because you keep moving closer to me!


... man who sit on stool, smell like $hit.
... man with tight trousers, pressing his luck.
... man who throw dirt, losing ground.
... man who fishes in other's holes, get crabs.
... he who live in stone house, should not throw glasses.
... cow with no legs, ground beef.
... two wrongs not make right, but two rights make U-turn.
... baby born in car with automatic transmission, grow to become shiftless bastard.
... bird in hand, make difficult to blow nose.
... finding old man in dark, not hard.

What's wrong?  Don't you like my company?


... man who smoke pot, choke on handle.
... OK for $hit to happen, will decompose.
... man with head on railroad track, listening for train to come, get splitting headache.
... sailor who get discharged from navy, leave buddies behind.
... secretary become permanent fixture, when screwed on desk.
... do not drink and park, accidents cause people.
... he who crosses ocean twice without washing, dirty double crosser.
... too many light bulb jokes, soon burn out.
... takes many nails to build crib, but only one screw to fill it.
... never raise hands to angry child, leave groin exposed.

Well ... now that you mention it ... NO!!


... man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
... man who keep feet firmly planted on ground, have trouble putting on pants.
... man who sit on tack, get point.
... man who run behind car, get exhausted.
... man who put cream in tart, not always baker.
... man who let woman on top, f_cking up.
... woman who spend much time on bedspring, may get offspring.
... sex on beach like American beer, f_cking near water.
... man like baby, want to suck tit all day.
... man who masturbate, only screwing himself.

And why is that?


... woman who dance wearing jock strap, have make believe ballroom.
... support bacteria, is only culture some people have.
... man who eat too many jellybean, fart in technicolor.
... man who marry girl with no bust, have right to feel low down.
... man with athletic finger, make broad jump.
... man who speak with forked tongue, should not kiss balloons.
... man who lose key to girlfriend's apartment, not get new key.
... he who sit on upturned tack, rise above all.
... even greatest of whales, helpless in desert.
... wash face in morning, neck at night.

You need a bath!


... elevator smell different to midget.
... America good place for Chinese restaurant.
... no man is island, but some women are whales.
... he who have last laugh, not get joke.
... man who sleep with old hen, find it better than pullet.
... he who outrun cheetah, f_cking fast on his 0feet.
...  man trapped in sewer, eat $hit and die.
... man who f_ck ugly dog, get howled at.
... all men eat, but Fumanchu.
... he who eat crackers in bed, have crummy sleep.

But I had a bath today!


... he who sneeze without tissue, take matter in own hands.
... wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.
... he who sniff coke, drown.
... Macintosh computer, like man making love in cemetery, f_cking near dead.
... man pi$$ in wind, wind pi$$ back.
... man who pull out too soon, leave rubber behind.
... man who eat pussy, do lip service.
... man with tool in woman's mouth, not necessarily dentist.
... girl who marry detective, like to kiss dick.
... men may have more hair on chest than woman, but on the whole, women have more.

Well it must have been a quick one!


... rape should not happen, woman run faster with skirt up, than man with pants down.
... woman wearing G-string, high on crack.
... virgin with thimble on finger, never feel prick.
... man who pull woman's bra strap, may get bust in face.
... woman who pounce on dead rooster, go down on limp cock.
... fly who sit on toilet seat, get pissed off.
... man who throw away watch, wasting time.
... man who fall in vat of molten glass, make spectacle of self.
... man who jump through screen door, strain self.
... man who push piano down mine shaft, likely to get A flat minor.

Hmm ... well want to join me for another one?


... man who put face in punchbowl, get punch in nose.
... man who sink in woman's arms, soon have arms in woman's sink.
... man who put cock on stove, have hot rod.
... never trust man with short legs, brains too near bottom.
... soldier who go to bed horny, wake with dishonorable discharge.
... woman who put detergent on top shelf, jump for joy.
... woman who slide down banister, make monkey shine.

Maybe later ... I have another page on this site I want to check out!

 

~ Thanks Smurk ... you monkey humper you ... for sending these to me ... too funny  !!! ~

Ok ... fine ... be that way!! %$@!!

 

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